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Mom’s guide to Rules of engagement when siblings are at war.

There will be days where all you do is deal with arguments and squabbles, incase you’re having that kind of a day

1. Never ever take sides and body language is a must, do not stand beside him or her, you stand smack dab in the middle, in front of them where you can see both, the mere leaning towards one child, a millimeter close is a sign you’ve picked a side. 

2. Stay calm and listen, you’ll be provoked, moderate language but let them say what they need to say, there is no better way to learn the truth than listening, wait for the silence.

3. Always hear both sides of the story, whose side of the story do you listen first? easy, the eldest of whoever is at war. They have the longest memory, this pertains to rule number One.

4. Now this rule is important, pay attention, when confronting them, keep an eye on the clock this is for you to check how long you spend with each one of them(equal time, they notice).

5.The rules change according to who argues with whom, such as boy vs boy, boy vs girl, senior vs junior, play by instinct but remember no taking sides.

Dealing with boy vs boy is easy, it’s usually physical and always observe the anger generating from each of them, sometimes you will see one of them has a hard time controlling it(just because they feel more),handle with caution,

A little extra attention and an explanation can solve this problem, it may take time, it may take many mini conversations but it’s solvable, extra hugs and kisses sneaked into the talks also helps them to understand, in the end, all is good.

Dealing with girl vs boy confrontation is a bit trickier as the girl usually cry, do not let the boy tease her,explain to the girl how boys love to tease and they’ll out grow it, it’s not personal, they are not mean, it’s just how they’re made, teach the girl a few tricks to deal with the boy, like show no fear or weakness.

eventually all argument end, tell them to move on, teach them to move on, never bring up the fight once it’s solved, they don’t want us to remind them, what’s done is done.

The rare moments when everyone is at war with everyone? 

Well, You’re the boss, banish them to their rooms except, the boys into the girls and the girls into the boys( trust me, they hate this)*smiling*.

and yes, I just wrote this because of wars fought and peace treaties written in my home.

Recipe time.

Now the best way to have this is to top it off with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and watch it overflow but having four kids who go ice cream crazy, it’s not possible to save a tub, so if you don’t see the ice cream in my images, you know what happened to it.

What you will need

3 ripe wood apple

a cup of grated jaggery, melted if unable to find jaggery, sugar will do.

1 cup of water

1 and 1/2 cup of Coconut milk

ice cubes

1/2 a teaspoon of Salt


In your mixer , add the scooped pulp of the wood apple, jaggery, Coconut milk , ice cube and blitz it,it’s that simple.

But if the consistency is thick add water. 

Add salt and check for sweetness, top it off with scoops of Vanilla. sri lankan. woodapple drink

Until next time.

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Brian Lageose

Thursday 20th of August 2015

I enjoyed the whole piece, but this line really made me smile: "I just wrote this because of wars fought and peace treaties written in my home."


Thursday 20th of August 2015

Thanks Brian, this is life at home for me.not complaining though. Have a good day

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