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She’s 15……

 

She’s smart,

Confident,

Sings beautiful, 

Loves chocolate and anything with cheese, especially mac and cheese,

She watches horror movies and crime series,

She’s dada’s first princess, she is our First born.

My beautiful baby girl Durrah, turned 15 today.

When someone tells me,”they grow so fast” talking about their own child, I used to brush it off as a typical mom reference not truly placing any significance on their comment.

It’s my turn to wonder where the years have gone. I used to look down on her, now I look up on her, my girl now stands taller than me. 

She looks in the mirror and sees a grown up (well …almost) girl.When I look at her I see, the baby she was, the little girl who gave me spontaneous hugs. Flashes of picture memories remind me of a baby, a toddler and a mischievous Seven year old.

The two of us, her dad and I, we were young, every little thing she did, the smiles, the touches even the potty business were new to us.

She was ours and she bought little doses of happiness from the day she was born and the best part, she let us sleep through the night only waking up for feeds.

I didn’t realize how lucky we were until we had our Second  baby.

 

ok, maybe I went a little overboard up there, the little terror has her moments, she is a neat freak and does hog the t.v controls, shows me attitude when she doesn’t get her way. 

She gets her funnies by threatening to tickle me knowing well my fear.

 I know, I’m being sentimental here so what?

You realize suddenly between now and then fifteen years have flown by in a blink of an eye.

And from tiny baby to this girl who speaks to me in equal terms, it’s hard to take in. She doesn’t need me to look after her, she does it all by herself, Miss inde.

There’s also the fact, well… she all grown up means I’m starting to feel my age !. 

 

 And with her turning fifteen there are a few adjustments I have to make.    

I am about to follow a tricky but necessary balancing act that will define the mother daughter relationship of ours, years to come .

Discipline and having respect towards me aside, there was a time when a simple “No” would suffice without a “why”.

Not so now.The”why’s”, 

“But why’s..?”,

“it’s not fair..!”can go on for hours.

Nevertheless, I’m taking a step back and letting her grow up, make mistakes, as hard as it’s going to be, let her get hurt ( but not badly),

The overbearing, controlling mama bear, I think has to go on permanent hibernation.

She is allowed to come out where family and boys are concerned though.

 For me, letting go of the need to control and manage another person’s life because that’s what my daughter is, another person with thoughts, likes, dislikes and a personality different to me.

Yes, she might have a few personal traits of me and Riza, compliments of our combined DNA .

But I can’t make her be what I want her to be. 

She is who she is, my daughter. 

There will always be a special place in your heart when it comes to your first born,

She or he will be the one to teach you patience and love.

She will teach you to be a mother and the true meaning of sacrifice.

 

Durrah, you taught me unconditional love when you wrapped your little finger around mine the first day you were born.You gave me confidence, when you trusted me.

Your smiles and hugs gave and still give me joy.

You taught me patience and control when you were stubborn.

I am thankful for your ability to be calm when there is chaos at home.

I love your smile, 

I adore your goofiness,

I love you, daughter mine, mwaaa … and happy birthday.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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renzeena

Thursday 26th of April 2018

this made me cry...i hugged my daughter if soon to be 5 and cried..heartfelt it is..

jehan

Thursday 26th of April 2018

Hi renzeena, she's 18 now, they grow too fast don't they? I think I've made a few mom's cry and hug their daughter with that one. my intention was not to make you cry but really enjoy the bonds you'll create with each child, it won't be easy sometimes but I guarantee it's going to pay off in the long run. unfortunately, I just don't have the time but I do add a small paragraph in my recipe posts when I can. I'll be posting a recipe in a few hours that has a bit of the same if you are interested. And thank you for your kind words.

Rasakama

Tuesday 6th of December 2016

Tears came to my eyes after reading your post. I have daughter too. My little girl just turned 2. very heart felt post !

jehan

Thursday 5th of January 2017

daughters are special, they can be a trial, I'm sure just like I was to my mom, but precious. cherish every moment, they grow up too fast.

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